Funny Shit to Put on Timder

If you're looking for funny tinder bio examples, you've just entered heaven.

I've gathered and selected some of the funniest Tinder profile texts here for your to borrow and steal from.

Or, if you've feeling brave, you can use my examples as inspiration and create your own unique masterpiece with the tips I've added.

Here's what you get in this article:

• A collection of Funny Tinder bio examples for you to steal from
• A marketing trick to make her text you without saying anything first
• What I did to my bio to triple my matches
• A fun to use checklist that tells you what part Tinder Profile sucks
• One simple trick to change your current bio into a bio that WORKS
• 30+ examples for guys and gals for a funny about me text!

By the way, did you know I created The Profile Checklist. You just fill in the blanks, and you discover where your profile is lacking the necessary attraction switches. As a bonus, I review a Tinder profile from a reader, using The Profile Checklist. Knowing your flaws will get you on the path to multiplying your matches. Download it here for free.

Funny Tinder Bio Examples for guys and for girls

Let's look at some of the best Tinder bios we could find when scrutinizing the web.

I like my coffee the same way I like my women

WARNING: Just because it made you laugh doesn't mean, you want to blindly copy this bio.

Why?

Because it can make you seem bitter.

And not many girls want to date a sour puss.

Human Sexuality

One of my favorite bios of this list, but there's a hitch…

…it has become quite well known.

Which means that a number of women will recognize it from somewhere and realize that you're not being original.

So what should you do if you want to get great reactions from girls?

Give the bio a facelift. Like so:

"I got a B+ in Sex Ed, so I'm pretty familiar with what gets you excited

*checks notes*

dresses with pockets"

I admit it's not the best. So how about a little challenge: come up with something better and I'll put it here where everyone can admire your mad writing skills.

I may like being choked

A great bio for when you have a choking fetish.

Do you have another fetish?

How about using this bio as your template. For example:

"I may like bondage but dolphins don't, pick up your trash."

(I withheld the f-bomb because it's over the top enough.)

Not the type to hold in farts for

A hilarious bio if you're a girl, but what if you're a dude?

Let's try and come up with something YOU can use.

So when I read the above bio, she's really talking about dating etiquette.

What kind of dating etiquette applies to a man?

Maybe that she has to treat you right.

To what kind of new and original bio does that take me?

Something like this.

"Break my bed, not my heart."

Game of Thrones Cersei Quote

Another bio that doesn't apply to most men.

So what kind of joke can we come up with if you change the first line to 'You want a knight in shining armor?' (That's the equivalent of what most women want  when looking for a man.)

"You want a knight in shining armor? Then buy a magnet."

Very punny, I know. But it IS original!

Game of Thrones Cersei Quote #2

Holy Tip:

One of the quickest way to repel girls, is by having poor spelling and grammar.

Why?

Well, a poor mastery of the English language gives her the idea you're a numpty.

In fact, some studies show that bad grammar is the second biggest turn-off after poor grooming habits.

Saying stuff like wyd, R U ok?, roflmao makes you look like a kid. Proper use of capitalized letters, grammar and punctuation, however, make you seem masculine and mature.

So be sure to proof-read your bios.

And one more thing…

…use white space.

People don't want to read big chunks of text, it's too much work! Nobody has time for that.

So always chop your bio up into little bite-sized chunks.

It's far easier and inviting to read than if it was one big lump.

I like bots

Some hilarious self-depreciation. But be careful!

Unless your photos show that you're also a confident person who enjoys life, this bio may make you seem like someone with low self-esteem

Which most women find a turn-off.

So only use this bio if you have good photos to go with it!

I'm on Tinder to make friends

A very funny bio, but it does have one major flaw if you're a guy.

What would that be?

It makes you seem like a phuckboy. A dude who only wants to hook up.

Which is fine. Nothing wrong with just wanting to keep things physical.

But phuckboys (as they're so lovingly called) turn off a lot of women (even those open to casual sex).

Why?

Because the type of guy who only wants sex is usually not very interested in a woman's personality. So he tends to be a bit cold.

It stands to reason that many women don't find that very appealing.

So unless you're fine with putting these phuckboy vibes into the world, consider using a less polarizing bio.

I need a girlfriend for clickbait

What a BAWS!

This bio absolutely hilarious to me.

But beware!

Joking about being underage could possibly get you banned. Here's how I found out:

Photoshop Paradise

This profile text format can work when personalized. But the photoshopped Tinder photos are what really stand out.

Never lost an arm wrestle…

There's a lot to unpack in this image and I'm not just talking about her beautiful behind.

The bio is pretty damn dope too!

Mainly the second paragraph about the threesome, "If I wanted to disappoint two people at once, I'd go to dinner with my parents."

This is hilarious because it not only implies she's bad at sex, but also that her parents are very demanding.

So it's a toofer!

A bit of a joke and also a bit of a personality share.

I personally find that mix ideal, because then she doesn't only laughs, she gets the feeling that she actually knows you a little.

Holy Tip:

Humor is KEY.

Your bio needs to evoke emotions in your match. One of the easiest ways of doing so is by making her laugh.

Although almost all the bios in this collection do many things at once, they have one thing in common:

They make you laugh.

And it makes sense!

Who wouldn't want to hang with someone that makes you el-oh-el?

A good way to make her laugh even more is by starting your bio in a way that seems sincere. That way the joke sneaks up on her.

Just like this bio:

I'm the kinda guy you can take home to meet your mom. She'll think I'm super funny, and charming… and cute, but actually kind of sexy at the same time? She falls in love with me. I… think I feel the same way. We get married. I'm your dad now.

I confront you, "young lady why are you on Tinder?" You're now grounded.

If you're anything like me, this bio caught you off guard.

The best thing?

A sudden surprise like this is often enough to make someone instantly swipe right.

Fuck the police

Probably not the best bio if you're actually working in law enforcement.

At least, not if you want to keep your job.

But it's pretty gosh darn hilarious though!

And I'm pretty sure this bio got him lots of action.

You know what I can't stand?

People I get along with best are usually those who can poke fun at themselves.

Why?

It shows they don't take themselves too seriously and that's very refreshing.

Plus, these people just ooze confidence. And who doesn't like oozing confidence?

I like it rough

Implying that she ended up in the hospital after an intense romp in the sack, what a woman.

I love it.

Plot twist

Very clever!

But don't think you can just copy this Tinder game and think you'll do as this guy undoubtedly did.

Why?

Because these types of swipe games show a lot of effort on your part. So you're investing quite some time in a dating app.

Many women will feel like you're putting too much time into something which should be treated casually. And thus be turned off a little.

That's why these types of games are best suited for frat bros and other young adults, because that's an age where these types of jokes are more normal and appreciated.

I get into your head

Another very sexual bio.

Which like I said earlier can work for a dude, if you change the phrasing a little. But being overly sexual can easily scare off a lot of women because it makes you seem like a walking penis.

So, on the whole, I think it's a better idea to stay away from sexual bios and go for something a little less polarizing.

Package deal

This is a great example of how a bio and photo can work together.

Even when you don't create a crazy Kermit photo, you can still often write a bio that connects to your photos somehow.

For example, suppose you have a photo of you and your pet. Or heck, just the pet.

Then your bio can say, "Her name is meatball."

Everyone will get it and because it's such a personal thing, you come across as a genuine and approachable guy.

Marilyn Monroe always said…

That bio is pretty dark so I understand if you don't find it funny.

But you should find it inspirational!

Because this is a good example of how you can use a famous quote of a celebrity and turn it into a funny bio.

Here's an actual quote from the great comedian Betty White:

"Why do people say 'Grow some balls'? Balls are weak and sensitive! If you really want to get tough, grow a vagina, those things can take a pounding."

Yes, it's pretty sexual. But you're also not being the typical macho guy so it evens out.

One day…

I. FUGGIN'. LOVE. IT!

She just seems like a joy to be with.

Holy Tip:

You don't always need to do this, but sometimes this is the difference between 100 and 0 matches.

I'm talking about radically changing your bio depending on your environment.

I usually have challenging, teasing profile texts. But at the moment of writing this, I am in Kiev for a big project.

Long story short: There's a lot of sex tourists here from countries where men have dark hair and tan skin. Just like me. And girls here hate those sex tourists.

Result: I'm not very popular here. Especially on Tinder.

This was VERY noticeable in my matches and conversations.

Matches were lower than usual and conversations more careful.

So, how did I solve this pesky problem?

By changing my challenging bio into a more boring one. One that made it very clear that I'm not here to buy sex, but rather for a work project. It's a bio that focussed on creating comfort more than anything.

The result?

My matches went up again and girls stopped asking all these interview questions.

The main takeaway here is this:

Adapt your bio to your needs.

If you're missing flirty vibes in your conversations, then make your bio more flirty.

Does everyone see you as a fuckboy that can't be trusted? Prove them different in your bio.

And so on…

Bonus points if you keep your profile text funny while doing so.

I'm the kinda guy…

What a ride!

Respiratory Therapy Student

I like three things about this bio.

Firstly, it shows you're confident. (She says she's 'cute enough to take your breath away'.)

Secondly, she's showing that she's more than just a hot bod, she has a big brain too. Which is a dynamite combo.

Lastly, it's written in a way that you don't come across as arrogant.

To me, she just seems playful.

Pros and Cons

A great example of a pro and con list done right.

Why?

She not just cracking jokes, but she's actually sharing REAL things about herself that give me a good idea of what she's like.

Picture this…

A wonderful bit of proze.

Just one downside though: the story mentions chloroform and robbing.

Although it's clearly a fictional story, you don't want to bring up anything remotely rapey and threatening.

Not only because it can scare off women, but also because it can get you banned.

Tinder doesn't play games.

Hello Ladies

A fun take on the Old Spice commercial.

Let me sleep in your stupid t-shirts

Being romantic in an aggressive way is actually hilarious.

The male version of this bio could be:

"Just steal my oversized hoodies already and let me buy you food you piece of shit!"

Holy Tip:

One of TextGod's main principles to be successful at online dating is STANDING OUT.

Most of the guys out there are doing the exact same thing. If you can show that you're different, you'll stand out and grab a girl's attention.

One way to stand out is by avoiding the typical 'shopping list' bio:

– Friends
– Music
– Good food and wine
– Parties
– Family

You've undoubtedly seen stuff like this before.

This type of bio lists a bunch of hobbies and interests, but all it really says is:

I am exactly like everyone else. I'm just more of the same. And I couldn't present myself in a more interesting way.

Here's how you can make that same bio more interesting by adding some adjectives and creative juices.

Some days I like a cozy winter night with French wine and family, other days I like a steaming all-nighter at a summer festival with wasted friends and pepperoni pizza.

I'm not saying this is THE bio to get laid like a champ, but it's definitely a gazillion times better than the original list.

Did you miss how I transformed the 'shopping list' bio into something good?

Let me help you catch up.

friends → wasted friends

music → summer festival

Good food and wine → French wine and pepperoni pizza

Parties → all-nighter at a summer festival

Family → cozy night with family

By adding these extra details and writing it in one long sentence, you end up with something many women will like.

Especially now that you're a guy who can enjoy cozy chill nights and crazy alcohol-fueled festivals.

So do yourself a favor, stay away from the factual list bios.

Current relationship status:

A hilarious template that you can definitely use with success.

Here's an off the cuff bio-inspired by the above screenshot:

"Current relationship status:

My cat won't return my calls."

I was kicked off of Tinder twice…

I can't lie, honesty and humor is pretty sexy.

And she's got it in spades.

I always keep a loaded gun…

Don't we all have introvert moments?

Here's a bio that just came to me after reading the above screenshot:

"I regret my tattoos. Not because I dislike the way they look, but because people keep using them as an excuse to talk to me."

Halal

Another template you can steal.

Here's one you can use if you like RPGs:

"Paragon in the streets, renegade in the sheets."

Tinder Bio Examples without screenshot:

Looking for a badass, already have a good ass.

You know who else likes food and travel? Everyone else.

I practice safe sex. I tie you to the bed so you won't fall off.

Daddy issues.

If you like water, you already like 72 percent of me.

I will jump to any height. Just ask, but if you ask me to jump 34 inches I will only jump 32 because that is as high as I can go. So basically I'm saying you are going to get 2 inches less than you're expecting.

Fat $tacks and petting cats, I'm lonely.

I'll treat you the way Kanye treats Kanye.

They say "you miss 100% of the shots you don't take" well I'm always down for shots.

Holy Tip:

Earlier in this article I promised you a Tinder tip to get her texting YOU, before you said anything at all.

And I always say that a man is only worth as much as his word…

…so here it is:

Every copywriter on earth knows about a thing called CTA. Any decent copywriter at least.

If you're a nerd like me then you might read CTA as Coat of Arms, a great Magic: The Gathering card. Or Call to Arms, a card in Hearthstone so strong that it got nerfed short after release.

Anyway, I digress.

CTA here, means Call To Action.

Where the writers ask the reader to do something. Such as "click this link to try my free Profile Checklist. Do it, it's fun and it gets you more matches!"

Seriously though, click here and see how I would rate your current online dating profile.

So, what can this CTA do for YOU, my dear reader?

Glad you asked.

Adding a Call To Action can transform your Tinder experience from getting your shlong stroked with sandpaper, to getting your donger stroked by moisturized hands of a Victoria Secret Angel.

How?

By giving them an incentive to text you.

Here's two examples:

Does pineapple belong on pizza yes or no?

Hit me up with 1 for a cheesy pickup line, 2 for a dad joke.

The best thing about a CTA like this?

It doesn't do any harm, and some people WILL respond.

Nothing to lose. Only things to gain.

Try it, and thank me later

Allergic to milk

I might be lactose intolerant but I can handle your milk.

–

We'll keep updating this page with newly found bios and bios sent in by our readers. If you've seen anything fresh, don't hesitate to send us a screenshot at louis@textgod.com

For more tips, check out these articles:

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Source: https://textgod.com/funny-tinder-bios-examples/

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